That Third Space: June 2017

““I used to think that Pakistan were the most interesting team in the history of sport. I now realize that they’re the most interesting team in the history of mankind. Their ability to teleport between farce and genius is unparalleled, and at their best they are like watching sport directed by David Lynch. Nothing makes a blind bit of sense, key characters appear out from nowhere, supernatural forces are at work and inanimate objects can talk. All you can do is run with the mood and the madness.”

- British commentator Rob Smyth

This has to be my most rushed piece (in time and length) ever - just because the writer in me wouldn't shut up even amidst the crazy June at work, I knew I had to do this, so better now while we are still in the festive mode!

I am no cricket expert - just a fan; the kind who only watches cricket when at least one of the two teams playing is Pakistan. At first, I resisted to write this piece because I wasn't sure if sport was my niche but the enthusiastic and the patriotic writer in me wouldn't sit still, so I had to surrender to the urge. This is a very humble dedication to our wildly glorious and victorious cricket team *Applause*

The world is in love with champions, victors, those who defy the odds and embrace victory. There is something truly enchanting and empowering about winning as a dark horse. And who better than us would know the feeling? No other team in the world tickles the nerves of their fans like ours! One day you see them struggling to stand up, the other day they are unbeatable, invincible. Only yesterday, they lost to their arch rivals, yet today they were able to bag the trophy by beating the same team with some of their very raw talent in action. The raw talent which comes at a time when there has not been any home cricket for over 8 years. Isn't this truly magical? Isn't Pakistan a land of hopes? Doesn't this thought give you a chilling sensation of optimism, excitement and expectations?

Pakistan are all about unpredictability and dramatic comebacks! People, who overcome insurmountable odds, and defy predictions and histories, shock the world into jaw-dropping results and are often celebrated and remembered as the best of winners for a long time. This sparks hope in the entire nation! Speaking for myself, this win has returned my lost childhood faith, my unflinching belief and optimism!

On Sunday, history was carved at The Oval; the world witnessed bottom-ranked Green team becoming the ultimate champions. To most prominent cricket pundits, the idea of Pakistan reaching the finals seemed remote, let alone lifting the coveted ICC Champions Trophy 2017, but all judgments fell flat on their face when the team led the country to a fairy-tale victory with grace and much relentless conviction. Who could have thought that that day at Edgbaston the sleeping lion in us had awakened to roar back with all its might and force? That’s Pakistan for us; every time we lose hope, it surprises us with its incredible ways.

What is it that infused magic in our nerves, vigor in the bones and made us the winners? You may call it avidity, drive, passion, fervor, motivation, or simply an attitude. Hitches and impediments do not mean the game is over. A true winner’s attitude means picking yourself up, learning your lesson and getting back in the game - this is my takeaway from this huge win!

Would this world ever be prepared enough to defeat us once we recognize our real potential? Once we decide to take it over and be the winners, is there anything which could stop us? Let's show the world our true strength and resilience - the side of us which is born to win! And let's keep our humility and tolerance in check, always, because only the lack of it has the power to destroy nations.

Here is to the world's most predictably unpredictable cricket team!!!

For better, for worse, in sickness and in health, we bleed green!!!

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""What a strange narrowness of mind now is that, to think the things we have not known are better than the things we have known."
- Samuel Johnson

Preface: Mr. Nosy* has his eyes set on you... on a 24/7 watch! Nosy is surveilling your every move and playing Sherlock in his life. He exhibits great deal of moxie in questioning your choices, judging your actions and trying to 'help' you realize what a failure you are at decision-making. You ask why? Well, it's Mr. Nosy's job, rather business! At least, this is what he thinks. Oh yes, he is delusional.

Censuring you gives nosies the pleasure they otherwise lack in their lackluster lives. Offering advice to people who need it and ask for it could be helpful but only without pushing limits. Some people in your life would be your well wishers while others might only gloat at your grief and loss. Value the opinion of those who mean well, and for the rest, we are blessed with middle fingers! DO NOT BOTHER yourself with people's unwarranted opinions - be who you are and do what you will! Just ignore the rebarbative nosies – if they play Sherlock, you be the Hollow Man. Make them feel like pariahs! Try not to waste your words and emotions on such Pinocchios, unless they cross limits and you really want to try some of those karate moves you learnt at school.

* Here Mr. Nosy is not gender specific. Nosy is nosy - whether it's a he or a she! I only went with 'Mr' because it sounded catchier for the post.

Hello Un-dearest Mr. Nosy

Ever wondered what would it feel like if somebody posed curious questions to you while you were going through something intense in your life or put forth questions to you that were of extremely personal nature? Bothersome, eh? Even the thought of it makes you lose your nerves, yeah? Want to lunge at the person and punch them hard? Go punch yourself for as many times as you made other people feel like cr*p about themselves just to satisfy your beast appetite for inquisitiveness!!

It is common for you to pass judgments on our physical appearances, our choices, our personal, work and home lives, etc. So, you think we aren't perfect? Dude, did we ever say anything about that thickhead on your shoulders? Oh we must have forgotten to mention you probably dropped it somewhere.

Eavesdropping on people’s talk? Heard somebody sharing something personal over the phone? Doesn’t concern you – move back to what you were doing prior to this ‘exciting’ new discovery of yours. Keep it to yourself and don’t squeal out the word. There is something called karma (and karma is a chimp!!). What goes around, comes around and bites you in your rear!!

People grow up in different families, they have different educational backgrounds and different experiences in life; all this results in their own individual sets of beliefs regarding what is right or wrong. What is right to you, maybe eerie and even wrong to others and vice versa! So, don't consider yourself to be the guru of everything! Develop qualities of humbleness and politeness; know that your low self-esteem is your problem so you ought to keep it to yourself! You CANNOT thrust your opinion upon people or dispraise them for not being the way you like them to be. Start the 'mind your own business' mission today and earn some respect and win some personal space of your own! Not every listener or soft target is forever a humble soul - you may have to encounter some witty, hurtful comebacks someday - don't run crying out into the woods then!

Giving someone a leg up or advising them when they welcome you to do so is great, but it's highly unacceptable when it is totally uncalled for. You're so seriously involved in other people's businesses that you often times repel by things they do. You can try being more reasonable than this, nosy! Don't go about interposing yourself everywhere and commenting on how people could do better if they had chosen to do so and so, instead of what they chose themselves. How could you even possibly think you are authorized to make such judgments? Stop butting in!

What we know from our observation and experience is that you have an uneventful life with zero excitement so this is your way to make your glum existence a slight bit 'meaningful'. You seek to fill the gap in your life by discussing other people and judging them unfairly to feel less miserable about yourself. You thrive on drama and attention!! Let’s make it clear - nobody we know has ever been to jail for the mere act of slapping, so we assume we're allowed to do that to whoever doesn't mind their own business. Next time you get your conk into others' matters, watch out for those livid hands. They're nigh to you than that nose of yours that you keep poking in!!

Stay away!!

Without a tinge of love,

From Those Whose Businesses You Like to Run

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